I managed to speak to my doctor and asked why he had said I wasn't ovulation and as such 'infertile', he simply said 'oh well we must have been taking the blood tests at the wrong point in your cycle' This made me quite angry and I was devestated, and without sounding dramatic, having suicidal thoughts with his 'infertility' crap. I wish he had just said something inconclusive like we need to do more tests so I will refer you.
I remember thinking, when I thought I was infertile, that all I have ever wanted is a family. I have never been career or achedemically minded. All I have ever wanted was to be a mum everything else came second. I was thinking that if I cannot have children then what the hell am I going to do with the rest of my life and thinking that I wouldn't care if I died as I have nothing to look forward to.
How different my life looks now!! We are so happy.
Although we did have a massive row the other night! Gavin is working really long hours at work at the moment and I am exhausted because of the pregnancy. So the house is a mess and neither of us want to cook dinner. So we had a massive row over basically nothing. But afterwards we made up by cuddling in bed.
Cuddling seems to be the only thing we do in bed right now! At first I was too scared, even though I knew my fears were silly I couldn't get past them! And now I want to but we are both to tired! Since I found out I was pregnant we have only done the deed twice! I might make a big effort at the weekend :)
Tomorrow I will find out if I am having a Niece or a Nephew! Rich and Jo are going to Baby Bond to have a gender scan, I have booked mine for 6th June. Sometimes it is really annoying being 6 weeks behind coz I want to know what I am having!
I think it is a girl but because I want a girl I think this may be wishful thinking. The trouble is a really cannot imagine having a boy!
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